A southern adventure

We headed out the door soon for a 10 day southern adventure, and this time it will be a REAL southern adventure, as in we're going to the DEEP south. We've been to Florida, Louisiana, Texas & Virginia before, but not to any of the other southern states. Rick, Andy & I are headed to Jackson, Mississippi and hooking up with Jordan and Jake for the Labor Day weekend. We'll stay in Jackson and see the sights and then drive up to Oxford, MS to see the Ole Miss-BYU game. It will be a sea of red and white (but at least these people will be much more civil and well behaved than the ones we're acquainted with who red and white, even allowing for lots of alcohol.) Before the game we'll head to a place called "The Grove" and participate in some southern hospitality. Our friend Keith made the comment that Ole Miss may have "The Grove" but we have "The Sacred Grove." Good point Keith! We're all so excited we can't stand it. Hopefully the Cougars will prevail.

After that we're headed to Memphis, TN and then we're going to Nashville. Jord, Jake and Andy will leave us at that point and head back to reality while Rick and I continue on to see:
Bowling Green, KY
Charlotte, NC
Columbia, SC
Augusta, GA
Atlanta, GA
Birmingham, AL
back to Memphis in route to
Little Rock, AR
near Dallas, TX (where we're staying the night with the Fast Easy Bread queen Lindsey & her family)
and ending up in
Austin, TX for the BYU game there on September 10

It's going to be 2,376 miles through 8 southern states we've never seen before. Thanks to travel agent Claire who made all our arrangements. Also thanks to Delta Skymiles for finally accumulating enough miles to pay for the flights. AND thanks to my husband for teaching summer school to pay for the rest! Hooray!

If we live to tell, I'll do just that. See ya'll later.

How is your child smart?

Boost your child's success by understanding his learning style.

I came across this interesting article about learning styles. Parents and teachers have always intuitively known that children learn in different ways and that an activity that grabs one child may not be of interest to another. But many of our traditional ideas about teaching imply that there is a certain way to learn particular skills. As parents, we've all had times when we've become frustrated by our children's apparent inability to accomplish a task the way we were taught to do it. When we have a better understanding of their individual intelligences and learning styles, we can provide experiences that speak to how our children learn best.

There are many ways to learn. One of the benefits of the multiple intelligence theory is that it offers parents many options — if a child isn't responding to a particular activity, there are many other approaches to try. Rick and I have had an ongoing discussion about this truth. He learns in a certain way and I learn in another. I'm not good at memorizing facts and figures and regurgitating them. He is. I'm not good at taking multiple choice tests. He is. I'm good at remembering things if I can hear or see it first and then tell it back. This is why together we make a complete person! We do actually function well as a team because we both have strengths and weaknesses that compliment each other. Halleluiah!

I thought it would be interesting to think about our four kids and how they plug into these intelligences. Of course they have ability in most of the areas, but I think they excel in some more than others. What do you think?

The eight intelligences are:

1. Linguistic - Sensitivity to the meaning and order of words. These children use an expanded vocabulary and usually like to tell jokes, riddles or puns. They also like to read, write, tell stories and play word games. (this is Rick to a T. He is very smart linguistically. Claire and Jord has strong abilities in the learning style as well.)
2. Logical-mathematical - The ability to handle chains of reasoning and to recognize patterns and order. These learners enjoy working with numbers, want to know how things work, ask lots of questions, and collect items and keep track of their collections. (this is Dave to a T. He is AMAZING with numbers and math. Even though I'm not good at math, I do think I do well in logical chains of reasoning.)
3. Bodily-kinesthetic - The ability to use the body skillfully and to handle objects adroitly. Kinesthetic learners enjoy sports and love to be physically active. They tend to use body language, dance, act or engage in mime. (Andy, Dave, Claire and Jordan excel here, especially in mime!)
4. Musical - Sensitivity to pitch, melody, rhythm and tone. These children love to listen to and play music, sing, hum, move to the rhythm, and create and replicate tunes. (Jord does very well in this area.)
5. Spatial -The ability to perceive the world accurately and to re-create or transform aspects of that world. These learners doodle, paint, draw and build with blocks. They also enjoy looking at maps, doing puzzles and mazes, and taking things apart and putting them back together. (Claire and Dave for sure.)
6. Naturalist - Recognizing and classifying the numerous species, the flora and fauna, of an environment. These kids like to spend time outdoors observing plants, collecting rocks and catching insects, and are attuned to relationships in nature. (outdoor lover Andy.)
7. Interpersonal -Understanding people and relationships. These children have many friends and tend to mediate between them and be excellent team players. (Andy excels in this arena. He has more friends than anyone I know and he relates to many different groups of people. Jord is also very good in this area.)
8. Intrapersonal - The ability to use one's emotional life as a means to understand oneself and others. Children with this type of intelligence control their own feelings and moods and often observe and listen. They do best when working alone. (Dave and Claire have some of these learning tendencies.)

What do you think? Did I get them right?

the upcoming Mrs. Jimmer Fredette

There are a lot of broken hearts out there. Why?? Fredette announced to his 53,971 followers on Twitter that he proposed to his longtime friend, BYU cheerleader Whitney Wonnacott.

"I'm officially engaged everyone," Fredette wrote. "She said yes and she was completely surprised! It was perfect!"

Think about it carefully Whitney.

The guy doesn't even have a job.

Get ready for a taste sensation

COCONUT PINEAPPLE ZUCCHINI BREAD

2 eggs
1 c. canola or vegetable oil
1 1/2 c. granulated sugar
2 tsp. coconut extract
1 tsp. vanilla extract
2 c. grated zucchini
1 (8 oz.) can crushed pineapple in its own juice, well drained (about 2/3 cup)
3 c. all-purpose flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
1 (4 serving size) box instant coconut cream pudding mix
1 HEAPING c. flaked sweetened coconut

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease and flour (2) 8x4-inch loaf pans OR (4-5) 5x3-inch loaf pans; set aside.

Grate zucchini using the large holes on a box grater; place in a colander and press, letting excess liquid drain.

Place pineapple in a mesh strainer; let drain well. Press down to release any excess juice from the pineapple.

Beat eggs in a large bowl. Add oil, sugar, coconut extract and vanilla extract; mix well. Stir in shredded zucchini and pineapple.

In a separate bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt and pudding mix until combined. Add to zucchini mixture; stir just until combined. Stir in coconut.

Divide batter between prepared pans. Bake @ 350 degrees 45-60 minutes for the large loaf pans, and 35-45 minutes for the small loaf pans, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.

Let cool in pans for 10-15 minutes; remove from pans to wire rack and cool completely. Makes 2 large or 4-5 small loaves.

You've got to see it to believe it

Last year I planted some sunflower seeds in our back yard. They came up just fine and we enjoyed about 12 sunflowers in the late summer. This year I didn't plant any new seeds, but noticed that a couple of sunflowers started growing from the seeds I planted last year. One of them really took off and grew about six inches a day until it got to about 14 feet! Then the flower started to sprout and grow and the weight of the sunflower started to weigh down the plant. It is HUGE! Kind of like a "Jack and the Bean stock" kind of huge. I love it!!

Want a better job? Get a better education.

This is a topic that a feel very strongly about. I'm climbing up on my soap box armed with great data, so watch out. There is a mountain of evidence to prove that good paying jobs come to those who have a good education. There are a few exceptions and a handful of cases where someone broke out of the norm and got a lucky employment break, but generally if a person wants a secure employment future, they must get an education or some sort of skill certification. If a person wants to scrimp by their whole life and worry about where the money is coming from for the essentials of shelter, food and clothing then just drop out of high school or quit school after graduating from high school and plan to struggle the rest of the time.
I've been spending a lot of time lately with someone in this situation. She is 18, dropped out of high school and is struggling to finish her GED. There are a lot of other issues going on, but the basic idea that life is going to be a CONSTANT daily struggle for her from here on out has left an impression on me. She won't stand a chance of getting ahead in life working minimum wages jobs, using food stamps and trying to survive. I took her to the grocery store to get some food and learned how food stamps work. She was scared to death that she wouldn't have enough money on her food stamp debit card to pay for the items she had in her cart. Government and church financial assistance can only do so much. I'm going to try and influence her to get more training and education and increase her chances of better employment in the future. Why oh why don't people see that settling when they are young into this pattern of living is only going to cause a lot of hardship and grief over the course of their lives? Why don't they see that the choices they make today determine the lives they will lead tomorrow?
Why don't young people stay in school? Why don't they continue their education after high school and get some sort of training or skill? Why don't they see the direct correlation between learning and earning? Why don't they see that every effort to study and learn while they are young will come back to them 10 fold as they grown older? Why don't their parents work with them to get good grades and take their education seriously? Why do parents let their kids waste their time on so many mindless distractions while their futures crumble before their eyes?

I'm so grateful for my parents. They valued education. They saw to it that each of their seven children got an education and some training so that they could support themselves and so that they wouldn't have to work minimum wage jobs. They sacrificed so that we could have this great gift. They valued education for the basic advantage it gave us to be well rounded and to be able to reason, write, think, discuss and know what is going on in the world. They valued it because they wanted us to be happy and successful and to strive towards something worthwhile. They set the example of how to contribute to society in meaningful ways and they expected us to do the same.

What keeps people from getting a degree or certificate of some sort after high school graduation?

I thought this graphic was very interesting. This article in the D News makes some really interesting points about Utahns specifically:

• Utahns with a degree or certification have an income level 75% higher than those who do not and are 2 1/2 time more likely to hold a salaried position that come with benefits.
• over the course of their work life, students who receive a Bachelors degree earn about $650,000 more than high school graduates. They also experience increased career opportunities, better health care benefit and overall a deeper quality of life.
• A child with parents who did not earn a degree had a 27.8 percent chance of earning one. If one parent earned a degree, that number rose to 41.8 percent, and if both parents have degrees the number peaks at 55.2 percent. Students with both parents and at least one sibling with degrees had the highest chance at 80 percent.
• Nationwide, Americans with at least a four-year bachelor’s degree tend to be employed more. The Bureau of Labor Statistics reports that, in July 2011, the unemployment rate for those with at least a bachelor’s degree was only 4.3 percent, compared to 15 percent for those who have not finished high school, 9.3 percent for those who have only a high school diploma but no secondary education.
• Utah's universities and colleges need to be more flexible in helping people obtain a degree while juggling jobs and family. This seems to be the biggest obstacle.
  

My personal feeling is that young families need to be prepared to sacrifice to gain an education. There are grants and loans and ways to make it happen. I worked very hard to help my husband complete his graduate degree and we sacrificed in a lot of ways to get through those years. We were really, really poor and those were very hard years. But we made it and we slowly started to see the benefits of the sacrifice. I hope that young people will weigh the benefits and the disadvantages and make the choice to work hard while they are young to obtain a college education or some sort of specialized training.

Money doesn't buy happiness, but there is a clear connection between the level of education an individual achieves and the level of happiness he has in life.

Aging gracefully

You want to age gracefully, right? Who wants to look old and worn out? Who wants to move like they're old and worn out? Who wants to be old and worn out?
Here are some great tips from an article I read:
1. Avoid the big no-no's: Don't smoke, don't get sun damaged and drink only moderately ( or in my case, not at all.)

2. Get moderate exercise: exercise is "the strongest beneficial behavior intervention that we know about." Moderate exercise makes the biggest difference

For example a 20- to 30-minute aerobic workout on the bike or machine three to four days a week followed by 10 to 20 minutes of weight training.

3. Eat a healthy diet and eat moderately: eliminate many unhealthful foods from the diet and reduced portion sizes, eat more whole grains, much less fat, more fish and more fruit and vegetables, eat red meat very sparingly (something in red meat accelerates inflammation in arteries and it turns out that inflammation in arteries ages your skin, ages your heart, ages all the things where your blood vessels go.)

4. Eat a diet high in antioxidants: dark fruits and vegetables such as blueberries, blackberries, watermelon, dark romaine lettuce and other dark greens. These foods are good because they are full of antioxidants, which are thought to bind with the unstable molecules that are constantly released as a byproduct of metabolism.

Although the science is still not conclusive for humans, there is strong evidence that these free radicals, knocking around in search of other molecules to bind to, damage healthy cells in the process. This oxidative stress can lead to inflammation and other adverse effects.

5. Take Vitamin E: take moderate (200 milligrams a day) Vitamin E supplements daily. Vitamin E is a powerful antioxidant that, in animal testing, has been shown to prolong the life of cells and reduce cell proliferation. It can help maintain your youthful look. Vitamin E, working alone or in concert with other vitamins, is doing more than improving appearance Your insides will look way better than you outsides because of this vitamin. Researchers have found a "significant" reduction in the incidence of prostate cancer, cardiovascular disease and overall mortality after 12 to 20 years.

Also important are practices like moisturizing skin daily, flossing regularly, managing stress well, having a rewarding job, a hobby that's enjoyable, and also a good marriage and healthy kids. Many experts said living a happy life is a key element in aging well. The message is simple - Making an effort can really pay off.

Read more: http://www.heraldextra.com/lifestyles/article_4be82c97-c256-51fe-831e-6b67ea1c57d0.html#ixzz1VPCnALhY

Grandparents that make a difference

We had a wonderful family reunion on Saturday. 95 people from my Dad's side of the family got together for about four hours to visit and be together. It was a lovely time to remember our grandparents Ray and Mayme and the legacy they left us. They were strong links in the chain that binds the generations. They showed us how to live life and how to pursue the things in life that are truly important. It was great to see uncles, aunts, cousins and their children and to see the number of people who are the product of these two wonderful people.

Our grandparents also taught us about the basic four food groups: pie, ice cream, cake and cookies. We enjoyed eating all of these traditional desserts: molasses cookies with frosting, homemade carmel ice cream, "poor-man's apple pudding," creme raisin pie and chocolate cake. Yum!

One cousin said: "Saturday reminded me of how much I love associating with the extended family. It always brings a smile to my face. Remembering Ray and Mayme was delightful."

And another said: "I will long remember the wonderful words that were spoken regarding our amazing Ray and Mayme and our dear parents. We are truly blessed with a unique and special heritage and to be a part of it all is, well...just a gift."

An aunt said: "such a great family. I feel blesseed to be a part of it. Grandma Mayme and Grandpa Ray left us a wonderful heritage. You could just feel the love on Saturday."

(If anyone took some pictures of the reunion, please share with me. My camera got dropped and broken and so I couldn't take any pictures.)

Now that I'm a grandparent, I realize even more the important contribution that grandparents can make to the lives of their posterity. Research has shown that grandparents can prove to be a resource to their families in so many important ways. They can actually influence fundamental aspects of their grand-children's lives, including helping them form their own individual identities and in conveying to them family values, ideals and beliefs.
Grandparents can act as family historians, mentor-teachers and also be nurturers of emotional and physical well-being. They are role models as they model how to live honorable and respectable lives. They can be the heroes after which many children seek to pattern their lives. They can also be playmates and be involved in activities that strengthen inter-generational ties.
They can:

• Organize and attend family get-togethers (reunions, birthdays and holiday celebrations)


• Work together (chores, running errands, community service, paid employment)


• Actively spend time together (board games, puzzles, playing catch, hunting and fishing, shopping, taking walks and drives)


• Attend religious-oriented activities (attending church services and socials together)


• Participate in family-oriented activities (writing and sharing personal histories, visiting extended family, visiting cemeteries, and discussing one's childhood and ancestors_


• Converse regularly (face-to-face, phone calls, letters, emails, Skype and text messaging.)


• Offer advice and counsel when requested

For more great grandparent information see:
www.aarp.org/family/grandparenting
www.grandparents.com
www.helpguide.org/mental/grandparenting.htm

What makes families flourish, what makes them fail?

I came across two interesting articles lately and the content of those articles are polar opposites...what makes families flourish and what makes them fail? Obviously much has been written on the subject and there are many theories as to why some fail and some flourish. Check out this talk given by the Mayor of Philadelphia to members of that community. I've got to hand it to Mayor Michael Nutter. He hit the nail on the head in the 30 minutes that he addressed his church congregation about the problems in their city. You can even watch it here.

Nutter’s chastisements—which didn’t spare parents, either—included:

• “Take those God darn hoodies down, especially in the summer. Pull your pants up and buy a belt ’cause no one wants to see your underwear or the crack of your butt. Nobody. If you're going to act like a butt head, your butt is going to get locked up."
  
• “If you walk into somebody’s office with your hair uncombed and a pick in the back, and your shoes untied, and your pants half down, tattoos up and down your arms and on your neck, and you wonder why somebody won’t hire you? They don’t hire you ’cause you look like you’re crazy!”
• “The Immaculate Conception of our Lord Jesus Christ took place a long time ago, and it didn’t happen here in Philadelphia. So every one of these kids has two parents who were around and participating at the time. They need to be around now.”
• “Parents, get your act together. Get it together right now! Parents who neglect their children, who don’t know where they are, who don‘t know what they’re doing, who don‘t know who they’re hanging out with, you’re going to find yourself spending some quality time with your kids in jail.”
• To fathers: “You not a father just because you have a kid or two or three. If you're not providing moral instruction to your children and only sending child-support payments you are just a human ATM. If you doing neither, you're just a sperm donor.”

Nutter zeroed in on the true root causes of the trouble in their city - "irresponsible parents and their ignorant, slovenly and undisciplined kids." Wow. I admire his courage in lowering the boom.

What works then in strengthening families? Check out this article in the BYU Magazine on the latest research on the subject. There are five key components that families who flourish actually DO on a regular basis. They involve all members of the family in their pursuit of a family that flourishes. This way of living in a family is internalized living versus only doing lip service to these practices . The five key principles are:

Commitment
Forgiveness
Kindness
SacrificingLack of relational aggression

J~O~S~H

Sets and graphics - AMAZING
13 talented musicians who accompanied Josh - PERFECT
Spine tingling entertainment with a huge sound - AWESOME

Classically trained
Celestially gifted voice
Josh Groban

More photos from the show here.

And it was so fun to share it with
Rick, Carol, Lee, Janet, Dave, Mike, Adam, Syd, Lindsey & Kylee!
Thanks to my sweetheart who bought me tickets for my 50th birthday to see him in Vegas six years ago, and for my birthday this year to see him last Saturday night
in Salt Lake City.

8-11-2011

Progress report to keep me motivated.
11 in 11

1. visit 11 temples this year and do the the temple work for at least 22 of our departed ancestors - COMPLETED July 2011

• 1. Provo, Utah temple-10 sealings for couples and sons
• 2. Provo, Utah temple - 5 initiatory
• 3. Albuquerque, New Mexico temple - 5 initiatory
• 4. Mesa, Arizona temple - 1 endowment
• 5. Laie, Hawaii temple - 1 endowment
• 6. St. George, Utah temple - 1 endowment
• 7. Provo, Utah temple - 8 sealings for couples, 4 sons (Rick), 3 daughters
• 8. San Diego temple - 1 sealing for couples, 3 daughters
• 9. Provo, Utah temple - 14 baptisms for women, 14 confirmations
• 10. Provo, Utah temple - 3 sealings for couples, five sons (Rick), five daughters
• 11. Provo, Utah temple - 1 endowment
• 12. Provo, Utah temple - 2 sealings for couples, 8 sons
  

2. lose 11 pounds

• I think I've lost and regained the same 8 pounds for six months now. Sigh.
  

3. read 11 books

• 1. The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks
• 2. Heidi (a childhood favorite - loved reading it again)
• 3. Same Kind of Different as Me
• 4. The Forgotten Garden
• 5. Jane Eyre
• 6. The Book Thief
• 7. Believing Christ
  

4. organize & label 11 of our family photo books

• completed 4 books, starting in 1976 through 1982
  

5. visit 11 elderly people - COMPLETED August 2011

• 1. G.G. 2. G.D.E. 3. M. Y. 4. L. B. 5. V. B. R. 6. D. F. 7. A. E. 8. U. R. 8. A. L. 9. U. V. 10. L. C. 11. S. C. 12. P. P. R.
  

6. sew 11 items and give them away

• 1 skirt for Skippy, 1 blanket for Skippy, 1 skirt of Lauren, 1 skirt for Ellie, 1 skirt for Ada, 2 aprons for Skippy, 1 skirt for Skippy, 1 jumper for Kindergarten Lauren

7. go with Rick to visit 11 new places

• 1. drove around Utah Lake for the first time
• 2. North shore Oahu, Hawaii - including Waimea, Haleiwa & Sunset beach
  
• 3. Hike to Diamond head, Hawaii
• 4. West shore Oahu, Hawaii - including Waianae, Maili & Ko Olina bay
• 5. Legoland, California
• 6. PETCO stadium, San Diego California
  

8. send birthday cards to 11 people I don't normally send to

• 1. A. K. 2. A. K. 3. D. A. 4. D. R. 5. D. S. 6. G. G. 7. T. S. 8. D. G. 9. M. J.
  

9. watch 11 old movies that I love but haven't seen for awhile

• 1. Dances with Wolves
• 2. First Knight
• 3. Mama Mia
• 4. Groundhog Day
• 5. A River Runs Through It
• 6. October Sky
• 7. The Little Princess with Shirley Temple
• 8. Father of the Bride
• 9. Emma
• 10. Wuthering Heights
  

10. make 11 new recipes

• 1. Lentil soup (won't be making this again - it wasn't a hit with the husband)
• 2. Ziti Primavera
• 3. Cinnamon rolls (new recipe)
• 4. Easter Dessert
• 5. oriental chicken in the crock pot
• 6. Grilled chicken southwestern salad (from Jordan)
• 7. Fast Easy Bread, cinnamon rolls, monkey bread, crescent rolls with Lindsey!!
  

11. invite 11 groups of people over for dinner - COMPLETED July 2011

• 1. Lacey & friends, Pat & Vern
• 2. Valentine dinner with the Mark & Colleen, Trent & Kelley
• 3. Cleofon group of women for luncheon
• 4. Ryan, Jill and Corbin C.
• 5. Dave's friends from college - Erick & Sam, Bryan & Kelly, Danny & Danielle, Kyle & Kayla
• 6. Cousin Margaret & family
• 7. Niece Syd & Adam, Danny & Danielle, Romney, Jesse
• 8. Ryan & Jill, Corbin & Loni (BBQ outside)
• 9. Denise, Lacey & family
• 10. Adam and Crissa
• 11. Lindsey R. and her four darling daughters, Corbin
• 12. 4th of July BBQ - 70 family and friends
• 13. Ben and Melissa
• 14. Mom, David, Diane, Syd, Adam, Bishop and Becca
• 15. Dustin, Daelynn, MacKinley, Lucy, Syd, Adam
• 
• 16. Jesse going away BBQ with lots of his friends

The internet - coming to a church near you!

Sunday I taught a Young Women lesson and I really wanted to show a You Tube clip produced by the church that went along with it, but alas, there was no wireless internet connection at our church. But guess what? That is going to change and soon we will have access at our building! Hurray!

Check this out. and this.

"Teachers will be able to supplement their lessons with online Church-produced media, job seekers will have easier access to the Church's employment website, and more members will be able to participate in family history work. In addition, local leaders will use Church Internet tools to manage membership and financial records, submit applications for missionary service, and watch leadership training broadcasts."

We know that playing Angry Birds is not acceptable behavior during church. We've been taught correct principles.

Some thoughts on polygamy

Polygamy has been in the news again recently. Inevitably it is associated with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints because our church was instructed by God to practice polygamy until 1890.The recent events of convicted child abuser W. Jeffs has brought the spotlight on this practice back into the forefront. I can understand that it is confusing for people not of our faith to understand the history of the practice of polygamy 120 years ago among the Mormon people with what is going on now with a break off group of people (not Mormons) who are using religion as an excuse to abuse women and children.
Separating the two groups and the practice of polygamy can be confusing. I recently read an article in the D News by a professor I know Valerie H.

"Hudson, a BYU political science professor, was not speaking on behalf of BYU or the LDS Church. Plural marriage, as Mormons refer to it, was practiced by some members of the LDS Church in the late 1800s, but the practice ended in 1890 after LDS Church President Wilford Woodruff received a revelation.

Drawing from language found in the second chapter of Jacob in the Book of Mormon, Hudson said that "when God commands men to marry, usually he commands them to marry monogamously. Sometimes, as Jacob notes, he will command them otherwise. But eventually he always rescinds polygamy and returns his followers to the established pattern of marriage: monogamy.

Plural marriage outside the command of the Lord is always a grievous sin, Hudson added. "The Lord speaks of severe punishment for those who practice polygamy without being commanded."

...Hudson believes verse 36 is there to remind Joseph Smith, founding prophet of the LDS Church, and others that polygamy is the exception to God's law of marriage, not the rule.

In the Lord's eyes, she said, monogamy is not a sacrifice, but a blessing. But polygamy is a sacrifice. … When God does command polygamy, he understands it is a sacrifice of the joy that would be there for his children if they could live the higher law … the Lord desires all of his children to have the natural joy that comes from living the law of marriage: monogamy.

Hudson said she believes that "in the eternities we will have the privilege of living under the law, not the exception to the law."

I think Hudson's analysis is excellent. It is clear in Jacob 2 that polygamy is an abomination that is forbidden by God unless it is "commanded." It is clear that the Church needed to grow and be populated during the 19th century. When the purpose for polygamy had been fulfilled, it was abolished and rightly so. It was a terrible burden and sacrifice which caused endless heartache to many.

A great gulf separates plural marriage as practiced by 3-6% of the LDS faithful during the 1800's, and polygamy as practiced by 100% of the FLDS today.

There were also serious political reasons why it ended. The church had done everything possible to live by this commandment at great sacrifice. When it became untenable, the President of the church pleaded with the Lord for guidance and was told that this burden was now lifted. I admit it requires faith to accept that it was instituted in the first place and then later recended. But, polygamy had fulfilled its purpose and was now abandoned for a higher law that would allow the church to go forward and not be destroyed by the U.S. Government.

Both my husband and I decend from those early polygamist unions over 100 years ago. The top picture shows my great-great grandfather (on my fathers side) and his two polygamists wives. The second picture shows my great-great grandfather standing on the left side of the man in the middle who is seated (George Q. C. who is my husband's GG grandfather!) Our ancestors knew each other and were imprisoned together for the practice of polygamy. Interesting!

What is being practiced now, in the name of the Lord by W. Jeffs and his followers, sickens me. I feel very sad for those innocent children who are brought up in this culture and who don't stand a chance of breaking out and making normal lives for themselves.

While kind of funny, I think this comic would be better if it said "We're getting out of here and taking our children and you can't stop us." I only wish there was more help available to those who want to break away and get out because they need all the help they can get.

Want to read a good book about a young woman and her children who did make it out? Read Escape by Carolyn Jessop.

That funny redhead

Lucy would have been 100 years old this weekend. I loved watching her funny shows back in the day and I still love to watch reruns of her shows now. She had a gift in making the most ordinary things in life funny because she usually got into some sort of major trouble in the process of doing ordinary things. She had a gift. I wish the female comedians today were as good as she was. Check out these never published before photos of the star.



You know you're big when Google celebrates your 100th birthday for all the world to see!

What's there to see in Utah?

We live in an amazing state!
Top Utah getaway destinations:

The D News ran this interesting article giving a list of all these areas in our state with another longer list of things to do and see in that general area. Check out the link above.
We've traveled all over this great state. The only areas I haven't seen are highlighted in RED. I really, really want to rent a houseboat and go to Lake Powell sometime. I think it would be a great family vacation and I know Courtney will agree.

1. Escalante area: Bryce Canyon, Capitol Reef, Grand Staircase, Boulder Mountain
2. Cache Valley area: Bear Lake, Logan Canyon, waterways
3. Cedar City area: Utah Shakespearean Festival, Cedar Breaks
4. Moab area: Arches, Canyonlands, Colorado River
5. Central Utah area: Little Sahara, Skyline Drive, Cove Fort, waterways
6. Davis County: Lagoon, Antelope Island
7. Kanab area: Grand Canyon North Rim, Monument Valley

8. Ogden area: Weber and Ogden Canyons, waterways
9. Park City resorts, Heber Valley
10. Lake Powell, Glen Canyon
11. Box Elder County: Golden Spike National Historic Site, Willard Bay

12. Salt Lake Valley: Temple Square, Salt Lake area canyons, Bingham Copper mine, Great Salt Lake
13. Vernal area: Flaming Gorge, Green River, Uinta Mountains, Book Cliffs (I've only been here once and would like to go again.)
14. Utah Valley: American Fork, Payson and Provo Canyons, waterways
15. St. George area: Zion National Park, Snow Canyon, waterways

Summer visitors

We've had a steady stream of visitors come through our home this summer.
~Dave's friend Danny J. came and stayed with us for a couple of weeks while he was waiting for a new rental agreement date to come up before he got married. We enjoyed having Danny around.
~Claire's sisters-in-law came and stayed with us for about four or five days while they were visiting the area. It was great to chat with them. They are wonderful women, both single, and I would highly recommend them to any interested suitors! One lives in CA and the other in TX. Contact info available upon request. The oldest one was recovering from doing a full iron man competition in Idaho and was moving a little more tenderly than usual. We enjoyed some early morning walks and they even went to my Pilates class with me. I loved having their female company.
~Jordan and girls came for about 17 days as mentioned previously. We had a fabulous time and enjoyed every minute of it. Jake flew up and was able to stay for about a week. We kept busy with lots of fun activities.
~Claire and R came for the 4th of July weekend. It was heaven to have all but Dave and Courtney home for a few days. Little Skippy kept us on our toes and she had a great time playing with her cousins.
~Carol, Taylor, Madi and Makayla came for dinner and an overnight stay to attend the Stadium of Fire program with us. It was a quick trip and I hope they come back again soon.
~Rick's sister Robyn came up for a week to visit and help their parents. We had some good chats with her.
~Rick's former roommate and mission buddy Terry R. and his wife stayed with us for two nights. They stayed over one night as they were driving to ID from AZ and the other was their return from ID back to AZ. We're conveniently located just off the freeway, so that makes it easy for people who are passing by and need a place to stay. Come on over!
~Dave and Courtney came to town for the return of Courtney's parents from South Africa where they were presiding over the Johannesburg mission. It was great to spend time with them and enjoy some chicken kabobs and corn on the cob (which accidentally caught fire on the grill.) Courtney came another evening and we passed an enjoyable time with her. I'm so happy she felt comfortable coming without Dave. They shared some very good news! Dave wrote the news down on a napkin and put it under Andy's plate. Andy discovered the message about half way through the meal. Happy, happy faces were found on all in attendance!
~Mom and David along with David's daughter Diane stopped by overnight on their way back to AZ to see the doctor. It was a fun evening eating Sunday dinner and enjoying some good conversation. Syd and Adam were able to come over as well. We also had our Bishop and his daughter who needed a good meal while Allie was out of town.

~Lee and Kylee came to town to celebrate Kylee's 24th birthday. We celebrated by eating some Cupcake Chic cupcakes and eating some tacos and fajitas on the patio. We played a rousing game of Things and laughed till we were sick. Would someone PLEASE come and get that game out of my house??

Suicide prevention

A few years ago a friend called me who was in trouble. I couldn't understand what she was saying, but I could recognize her voice. By the time my husband and I got to her, she was face down in vomit on the floor and was unresponsive. We helped her and called 911 and they came and scooped her up and took her to the emergency room. I stayed with her as they cleaned out her stomach and saved her life. She had overdosed and it wasn't the first time nor would it be the last attempt.
I know this is a difficult subject, but it is an important subject. I don't think that we can turn our backs on it because it is unsavory and no one wants to think about it. I've been thinking about how to help those who are contemplating suicide a lot over the last month or so. The affects can be so devastating for the ones left behind. I've observed how difficult it is for the family and friends who are close to the person who left them unexpectedly. They sometimes feel that it was their fault or that they should have done more to help. Suicide causes a lot of remorse.
I ask myself, what can be done to prevent this tragedy?
There is a lot written on the subject. Check out this link at the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline for more information, and this link for the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention.

What Are The Warning Signs For Suicide?

Seek help as soon as possible by contacting a mental health professional or by calling the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK if you or someone you know exhibits any of the following signs:

• Threatening to hurt or kill oneself or talking about wanting to hurt or kill oneself
• Looking for ways to kill oneself by seeking access to firearms, available pills, or other means
• Talking or writing about death, dying, or suicide when these actions are out of the ordinary for the person
• Feeling hopeless
• Feeling rage or uncontrolled anger or seeking revenge
• Acting reckless or engaging in risky activities - seemingly without thinking
• Feeling trapped - like there's no way out
• Increasing alcohol or drug use
• Withdrawing from friends, family, and society
• Feeling anxious, agitated, or unable to sleep or sleeping all the time
• Experiencing dramatic mood changes
• Seeing no reason for living or having no sense of purpose in life

I can see some of these warning signs in my friend even now. She lives alone. She is estranged from her family. She is a dear kind friend, but she has some significant mental health challenges. Given all of her obstacles, I marvel at her strength to fight back and to carry on. I've know her for more than 20 years and I've observed a thing or two that really helps her. I think these are things that would help anyone with suicidal tendencies.

1. Friends she can depend on. People who are her friends unconditionally. People who accept her for what she is and don't try and change her.
2. Friends who listen, who invite her to go places, who show an interest in her life. People who take time to be with her and do things, even little things. She doesn't want to feel like she is a "project" for anyone. She can tell the difference.
   
3. A hobby or way to express some creative abilities.
   
4. Work. Having something to do.
   
5. Consistency. We have a walking date every Monday at 5:30. We rarely miss, rain or shine. Her other friends have similar things that they do with her. She counts on it. She needs it. EVERYONE needs human interaction.
6. Service. She has found a way to serve. She tutors students who need help with math. She volunteers at the library. She gives to others in other ways as well and this really makes her feel worthwhile and needed. The more she is needed, the happier she is! The more purpose her life has, the better goes her mental health. I believe that most people need to feel needed and wanted. It's a pretty sad life otherwise.
7. Faith in a higher power. A belief that our lives have a purpose and that we are on the earth to accomplish some things and to return to our Father in Heaven.
   

There are so many people who feel alone in the world. They may be alone in the world. I think it is very important to identify people who are lonely, the aged, the sick, single people who are shut ins and who may not have a strong support group. Visit them, take them somewhere, show some interest in their lives. Be their friends. My opinion is that some suicides could be prevented if people took notice and reached out more. Make a visit. Pick up a phone. Send a card. Say hello. Set a lunch date. Just talk and ask the person how they are doing. Listen.
What are your thoughts? What can be done to prevent this tragedy?

Suicide

An uncle
A cousin
A brother-in-law
A dear friend of my husband.

Lives extinguished in a flash, at their own hand.
It's hard to understand.
It's hard to imagine pain so severe that ending ones own life seemed like the only solution.
Was it thought out over a long period of time or was it a spur of the moment kind of thing?
What despair is so intense that this seems like the only option?
Some contributors could have been:
Depression. Loneliness. Isolation. Addiction. Hopelessness.

Could we have done more?
Should we have done more?
Those left behind are left to suffer and wonder...
Why?

There are no easy answers.
Only questions that will never be answered.
At least not now.
But, maybe someday.

Suicide: Some things we know, some things we do not.
read it here.