Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?

Tonight while I was home alone I watched this movie I'd recorded a few weeks ago on the DVR. (Gotta love a DVR - how did we ever get along without them?) Anyway, I have either never seen this movie or I don't remember ever seeing it. I thought it was very good and I would recommend it. Apparently it got 2 academy awards - one went to Katharine Hepburn for best actress. I've loved Sidney Poitier since I saw To Sir With Love. Apparently Spencer Tracy died just 17 days after filming was completed and this was his last film with Katharine Hepburn. Anyway, I digress.
The random thought I wanted to post tonight had to do with prejudice. The 1967 groundbreaking story dealt with the controversial subject of interracial marriage which had been illegal historically in most of the United States, and was still illegal in 17 Southern U.S. States up until June 12 of that year. It's been 41 years since the movie was released. I couldn't help but think about all the advancements that have been made in those 41 years in eliminating prejudice. Interracial marriages are very common now and widely accepted. But I wonder if we as a country have made lasting advancements in the overall area of eliminating racial prejudice. I don't feel well qualified to give any answer, especially living in the predominately white valley where I live. My opportunities to live in a ethnically diverse part of the country will probably never happen. The information I gather about continuing prejudice will have to come from reading the newspaper and national magazines. Based on that, it seems like racial prejudice still exists and in some cases is worse than ever although now it involves many more races, religions, and nationalities. I think it comes down to people not accepting other people who are different than they are, and thinking that they are better. It seems like a lot of people are either afraid, suspicions or untrusting of what they do not know or someone they do not know or a way of life that is different from what they are use to. Trying to find the good in others, finding commonalities and shared interests can go a long way in building bridges. I abhor racial jokes, slurs and bashing other people because of their race, religion, and chosen way of life. My opinion is that we don't have to agree with the choices people make, but I don't think we have any right to verbally slander them or ostracize them.

Now that's what I call a Blood Drive

Vampire book launch at BYU Bookstore Aug. 1 to feature blood donation drive
The Brigham Young University Bookstore will host a blood drive to launch the newest book in Stephanie Meyer’s vampire-themed Twilight Series Aug. 1.
MountainStar Blood Services personnel will be taking blood donations from 2-6 p.m. at the Cullen’s Culinary Cafe on the third level of the bookstore during regular hours, and will return that night dressed in vampire get-up to accept donations during the “Breaking Dawn” Book Launch Party from 11 p.m. to 12:30 a.m.
Donors can sign up in advance by visiting the general book section on the main floor of the BYU Bookstore or by calling (801) 422-3584.
“Since the books are about vampires, we decided to draw blood to play on the vampire theme,” said Linda Brummett, manager of general book, “This is a great way to not only have a book party, but to make a difference and donate blood to save lives. People smile at the idea of doing a blood drive with the book launch because it just works—blood and vampire books.”
“Breaking Dawn” is the fourth and final book of the popular Twilight Series by BYU English graduate Stephanie Meyer. The book tells the story of a vampire family who take the high road by refusing human blood and restricting themselves to hunting wild animals, tied in with a complicated love story.
The book launch will include drawings for prizes, free books and Twilight memorabilia for blood donors and party attendees. Everyone is welcome.

the Daily Newspaper

For as long as I can remember, we've subscribed to a daily newspaper. It just wouldn't seem right to go through the day without reading a newspaper and finding out what's going on in the world, the nation and the community. Both Rick and I came from homes where our parents subscribed to the newspaper and read it daily. There have been days when we don't get the chance to read the paper, but we read the paper many more days per week than we don't. I also enjoy reading the paper online, espcially if I'm busy and can't sit down to read the entire thing, at least I can catch the highlights. A good daily paper can do several things for a reader, such as: inform, enlighten, entertain and teach. We currently subscribe to the Deseret Morning News. We also take the Daily Herald on weekends. Rick likes to lie down on the living room couch and read the paper from cover to cover most evenings. It relaxes him and he doesn't feel good about the accomplishments of the day if reading the newspaper isn't among them. He especially enjoys the sports page, Tips from Heloise, the comics and the ads from Big 5. He has learned some fabulous tips from Heloise, such as how to clean your bathtub with shampoo and baking soda - which he does with some regularity. I know my Mom and her husband enjoy the cross word puzzle section, among other things. I especially enjoy the editorial section, the column from Ann Cannon and the relatively new weekly pull-out section called Mormon Times. We both like to read movie and theater reviews and letters to the editor. We find it amusing and interesting to read what other people write and to have a glimpse into their thought processes. It spurs good conversation. Reading the paper and sharing what we have read has been a great way to stay connected and share our thoughts and feelings about current events. I highly recommend it!

Killer Shrews

See a video clip

I faced a scary chapter from my past this last weekend. I watched the old black- and-white movie
"The Killer Shrews" in broad daylight with my husband nearby for protection. That's right folks, I faced one of my worse fears and I stared it down.
Growing up in Rupert, there wasn't a lot to do on weekends as a kid who couldn't drive yet. We made our own fun (this is future post material right here) and we made use of what we had for entertainment. Mom and Dad would usually go out on a Friday night date, which left Paul, Lee, Carol and me home alone. Carol was the youngest and she usually went to bed early and then Paul, Lee and I would settle in to watch "Friday Night Frights" on TV. We watched some of the old classics, many in black and write and most so unbelievable and stupid that they hardly even stirred the imagination. However, one night along came the movie "the Killer Shrews" and my life was changed forever.
This movie freaked me out. I mean, scared me silly. Scared me enough that just remembering it while sleeping alone in the family room while recovering from having my appendix surgically removed some time later caused me to have to go sleep with Mom and Dad during the summer of my 7th grade school year. Um, that's kind of embarrassing to admit. It messed with my sense of security at home at night. Forever thereafter I dreamed and worried about being attacked IN BED at night by some animal that was in the house. The movie placed in my psyche an image of a animal predator walking silently around the house at night looking for a meal. Arms and legs that weren't tucked securely under the blankets were fair game for being bitten, and then the poor defenseless victim would be dragged from his or her bed and consumed whole by ravenous beasts with fangs a full six inches long.
The plot was stupid and simple. Scientists went to an island to do genetic testing on small mouse- like creatures called shrews, trying to get them to grow and reproduce in new ways. The experiment ran amok and the genetically-altered shrews then took over the island. The scientists were holed up in a house surrounded by a high fence, but the shrews begin to burrow in through the adobe walls and attack the terrified people inside. Even the saliva of the shrews was fatal if it touched human skin. In the end, the hero and heroine escape on a boat, but not before the ghastly deaths of three or four of the other scientists.
My walking partner and I were talking about scary shows we'd see one morning and I told her about "The Killer Shrews" movie. She laughed and said that her husband had just bought a DVD of some old horror movies and that she had noticed the title of "The Killer Shrews" on the DVD. Could it be the same life-wrecker from my past? If I dared watch it, would it conjure up all the old images and fears? Would I ever be able to sleep alone at home again? I borrowed the DVD and put it on the shelf for more than a month, working up the courage to watch it. Finally, last weekend, we took it down and put it in the DVD player.
Terrible special affects, horrible acting, unbelievable plot, laughable creatures - but it still gave me goose bumps and I'm not taking any chances. I'm keeping my arms and legs completely covered by the blankets even if it is 80 degree is our room at night.

Mental Illness

I went to lunch today with a friend whose son is bi-polar. I went on my regular Monday night walk last night with a friend who has suffered from dissociative disorder (split personality as it was once called) and borderline personality disorder most of her life. I played tennis this morning with a friend who told me that there are five autistic boys in our ward right now. I know people who are have ADD, ADHD, who have tourettes syndrome (a neurological disorder), hoarding disorder and who are narcissistic, just to name a few illnesses/disorders. I went VT for years to a home where the husband was schizophrenic, unemployed and a threat to himself and his family. I've been to the mental health lock down unit at the hospital at least eight or nine times and I've talked to doctors and therapists about treatment options for my friend. I've held her hand while she had her stomach pumped and I've gone to her home when she was passed out on the floor and have been there along with my husband when the paramedics came to the rescue.
I know this much - most who suffer from these ailments are doing their best to cope. I know another thing as well - mental illness is real. It's as real as a stomach ache, diabetes, cancer or a broken bone. One of the challenges is that is doesn't show like a cast on a leg and when asked "where does it hurt" the answer is usually vague and hard to pinpoint. It seems to hurt everywhere sometimes and nowhere at other times. Mental illness seems to touch us all at some point in our lives. It's everywhere.
I've often wondered, "what can the person with mental challenges control and what can't he/she control." I don't know the answer. I think this is why we can't judge people, because we don't know what they can control and what they can't control. Only our Father in Heaven knows this. The thought that maybe those with these illnesses/disorders can't control their words and/or actions has helped me in realizing that many times their actions, (or lack of actions, their words, or lack of words) the things they say and do that seem so irrational and nonsensical, are beyond their control.
My husband sees a long line of mentally ill people in his profession. Most are heart-breaking situations and it seems like these people aren't getting the help they need in our communities. Sometimes the help is there, but they won't take it. It's a very complicated social problem. It seems like our prisons are filled with mentally ill people. Rick and I both went into homes to help people when we served in church callings - he as a bishop and I as a RS president - filling out food orders, and trying to help. The stories are complicated and sad. Mental illness affects the entire family over the course of years and years.
What can be done? I don't have any real answers, but I think a few things can help. Getting a professional diagnosis is vital. I believe that taking the proper medications can go a long way in helping the individual cope better with life, and can affect the person and those around them for the good. From what I've observed, a person who is off his meds doesn't do as well as a person who faithfully takes his medication. Good therapy seems to be another effective tool. My Monday walking friend has a therapist who has literally saved her life. This therapist is someone who understands her mind and who is helping her cope with her past, a past so terrible that it has caused her personality to split. I have nothing but admiration for people with mental health struggles who are trying to get help. I think that we should all be less judgmental, more encouraging, and where possible, give the poor struggling families a break or a way to get away from the stress of the situation. Learning more about the illnesses can also help in understanding and helping. This web site has helped me a lot as I've tried to get more information to help some people - the National Institute of Mental Health.
No one can pray away mental illness. I don't know of anyone who has been healed from it through fasting and prayer and righteous living alone. This isn't to say, however, that these tools don't help. They do and I've seen evidence of that as well. I just don't believe that they cure. I think the only cure will be in the resurrection when "all things shall be restored to their proper order, every thing to it's natural frame." Alma 41:4

The color purple

I love the color purple (no, not the movie.) I love, love, love it. I've loved it for as long as I can remember. I had a purple bedroom growing up that had purple shag carpet, purple painted walls and a purple and white floral bedspread. My husband and I have a purple bedroom now. Well, it's dark eggplant purple mostly, but still. It has wallpaper on the walls and I don't intend to change it anytime soon, even if wall paper was out of style years ago. I go with what I like. My little grand daughter even knows that Grandma Vonnie's favorite color is......purple!
So, today I came home to find these beautiful purple roses on the counter in the kitchen. Just think of that - two DOZEN purple ROSES. Have you ever seen such a thing? And the best part was this note that went with it.
7/28/08
Dear Vonnie,
Congratulations on your blog! I thought purple flowers would be just right. Love, your husband.
How great is that? How sweet and considerate? How thoughtful on so many levels? What a great, sweet, considerate, thoughtful husband I have.

Albuquerque, New Mexico

See pictures of Albuquerque.
Our friend Keith just sent us this link to these amazing pictures of Albuquerque, New Mexico and of Corrales which is the community where he and his wonderful wife Lori live. They are beautiful pictures of the Sandia (which means Watermelon in English) Mountains and surrounding area. One of the pictures is of a city park area and it looks just like the city park near the home of our New Mexican family members. We love to visit New Mexico and see all the beautiful sights there. We ventured out to Taos on our last visit this summer and had a great time. We’ve also taken the tramway to the top of the Sandias for the beautiful panoramic views you see on the web site. Unfortunately, the day we went there was a thunderstorm and we feared for our lives dangling from a steel cord in the tram high above the mountain range. Great memories. We left the base in beatiful weather and arrived at the top in a snow storm. Such is life in New Mexico. The climate is mild most of the time however. Neither too terribly hot or cold. I like to visit Old Town Albuquerque and pick up something new to add to my silver or tourquoise colletion. Great food, great Balloon Fest in the fall and wonderful people there. I'm a fan of the city by El Rio Grande.

EHG - his influence continues

We recently held a little memorial with our children when they were home for a few days for my dad EHG who passed away 25 years ago. We listened to a cassette tape of a talk he gave years ago in our home stake in Idaho. It was wonderful to hear his voice on tape, to hear his testimony and his love expressed for this great land. We also watched his funeral that someone recorded all those years ago and I'm so happy my children could watch it and learn more about my dad through it.


I put together this shadow box in his memory and showed it to the kids at the memorial. I received these personal items of his after he passed away on July 8, 1983. They include the following items:
*a baby picture of me with dad in Rupert at the little red house where we lived
*a Lincoln National Life (the insurance company he worked for) tie clip
*a handkerchief with the letter "E" monogrammed on it. He always carried a handkerchief in his pocket
*his wedding ring
*a picture of him in his military army uniform from WWII
*the last pair of eyeglasses that we wore
*scouting pins representing all the years he spent working in the scouting program (he earned the award of Silver Beaver)
*a picture of him in front of our home in Rupert in his farm clothes. He remodeled the house at least four times to "add on" rooms and fix things up for it to be a comfortable home.
*a little tractor to remember all the farm work he did on our 40 acres
*black bow tie to represent all the "black tie" events he and mom went to on Lincoln National Life conventions all over the world, earned as a reward for his success as an insurance salesman
*a wedding picture of me with mom and dad in the living room in Rupert where the reception was held
*my graduation picture with dad from Minico. He taught school there for 32 years and I took drafting from him my senior year
*a leather coin purse with "Berlin" tooled into the leather - a memento from the war
*my silver dollar, the last dollar he symbolically gave me when Rick and I were married, presented in the family room in Rupert
*his missionary copy of the Book of Mormon with his missionary card
*a picture of him at Acapulco, Mexico playing in the surf while attending a LNL convention. Dad always loved to have a good time and play with us kids when he had time.

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I still miss him, even after all these years. I sometimes just burst into tears at odd times and for different reasons thinking about him. His premature death changed the trajectory of all our lives, especially the live of my Mother. I’m so proud of her for carrying on through it all and remaining positive and productive and doing what she needed to do to survive. Sometimes I wonder what life would have been like with him here over these last 25 years. How different would we all be? I have no doubt that his influence would have been felt and that he would have had a hand in leading his family in love. I think he would be delighted to see the growth that has taken place and he would have loved to meet and know all the wonderful in-laws and grandchildren who have come into the family over these last 25 years. I know he would take great pleasure in his family.
I just hope that when we meet again, that he will be proud of me and of what I’ve tried to accomplish. We were all robbed of his presence and influence, but maybe it’s made us stronger and more independent because we’ve had to proceed without his leadership. He is still the voice in my head and my great example in how to live life. His ways with people, his priorities, his values, his strength in the church and in all that really matters continue to be a great example to me. We lost a lot when we lost Dad, but we’re persevered and hopefully learned something in the process. I do believe that "all these things..have given us experience....and have been for our good." Who would have thought that 25 years ago? It is truly through trials and pain that we learn so many of the experiences that need to be learned and that can only be learned through the process of going through the trial.
I wonder how often he can see us and what he knows of his wife, kids and grandkids. I know it sounds cliché, but I can’t wait to see him again. Since we celebrated Father’s day a month ago, I’ve been thinking a lot about my Heavenly Father who I’ve never seen and of my earthly father who I know well. I owe them both so much and I can’t wait to “again behold his face.”

Grudging respect x2

Read Bronco article in the DNews
OK, so I have to admit, I have a love/hate relationship with BYU football (actually with the whole university.) Over the entire time I've been married, BYU football has occupied a MAJOR part of my life and the life of my husband and family. They are fanatics. I'll probably post more on this subject another day. For today, I was struck with someone who has "kept up the good work." Seriously, is this guy for real? I believe so and this article shows his true colors. I have grudging respect for the guy and his program. Shoot, I may even have to attend a few games this year.

Next article:
Read Osmond article in the D News
Here is a link to an article about another group for whom I have had grudging respect over the years. I'm not a fan. Too cutesy for my taste. Today when I was watching "music and the spoken word" at the MTC with the sister missionaries in our branch (which is an amazing program by the way, one to which I haven't paid much attention over the years) I have to admit that I was impressed with the family and the way they performed with the choir and the orchestra at temple square. As stated in the article, they also did two performances on Friday and Saturday night at the conference center, sort of their farewell performance. I wish them well. I do think they have been good ambassadors for the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Put your shoulder to the wheel

We all have work to do. Life is work. Some people have easy work assignments for a time and others have difficult and laborious assignments or tasks to perform in this life. Over the course of our lifetime, our work in life will probably run the gamut between ease and difficulty. That's why we are here - to be tested. Sometimes the testing isn't to our liking and we want to avoid the lessons to be learned. The work is too hard and we don't want to continue.
Working in life applies to many different experiences. Our life's work may include leaving our homes and going to a different place for employment or it may involve taking care of others, or it may involve doing both. One is no less valuable than the other. There are as many jobs to be done as people who do them. We work on our relationships. We work for monetary gain. We work for security and enjoyment. I believe that even happiness requires work.
My thought on the topic of "keep up the good work" is to do whatever job or assignment we have in life to the best of our ability. We are all unique individuals who have different skills, abilities and talents. I believe that part of the test of mortal life is to figure out what gifts we have been given and then to find a way to share those gifts for the benefit of others. By sharing, we benefit in immeasurable ways.
My dad frequently signed off his letters with the following words when I was a missionary serving in Argentina "Keep up the good work." He meant: Keep going. Keep working. Keep trying. Keep doing. Keep becoming. Keep achieving. Keep getting up in the morning and putting one foot in front of the other.
A dear friend my husband and I have had for years has reduced success in life down to three action items: 1) Get up 2) Show up 3) Shut up. It's a simple formula for success as far as I'm concerned, with the possible addition of "keep up the good work" added in at the end.
I read a book a few years ago called "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly." It caused me to think more about life and about what I can make of my own life. I thought about my many blessings and it helped to put my life in perspective. What if the only "work" that could be done was in one's own mind? Would I like my own company? How would I reach out to others? Would I reach out to others or would I dissolve into self pity?
I've discovered that I feel best about myself when I "work" for the benefit of others and try to help someone. I don't always do a great job at it, but I know that I feel most worthwhile as a person when I do.
The world has need of willing men (and women) who wear the worker's seal.
Come, help the good work move along. Put your shoulder to the wheel.
Put your shoulder to the wheel; push along. Do your duty with a heart full of song.
We all have work; let no one shirk. Put your shoulder to the wheel.

Random Thoughts

I friend of mine who I admire greatly set up a blog as a depository for her random thoughts. That idea resonated with me. I too have a bunch of random thoughts on various topics and I also come across ideas from other sources that I want to preserve and share. I hope this blog becomes a place where I can share some random thoughts and observations I make from time to time.