You've got to see it to believe it

Last year I planted some sunflower seeds in our back yard. They came up just fine and we enjoyed about 12 sunflowers in the late summer. This year I didn't plant any new seeds, but noticed that a couple of sunflowers started growing from the seeds I planted last year. One of them really took off and grew about six inches a day until it got to about 14 feet! Then the flower started to sprout and grow and the weight of the sunflower started to weigh down the plant. It is HUGE! Kind of like a "Jack and the Bean stock" kind of huge. I love it!!

Want a better job? Get a better education.

This is a topic that a feel very strongly about. I'm climbing up on my soap box armed with great data, so watch out. There is a mountain of evidence to prove that good paying jobs come to those who have a good education. There are a few exceptions and a handful of cases where someone broke out of the norm and got a lucky employment break, but generally if a person wants a secure employment future, they must get an education or some sort of skill certification. If a person wants to scrimp by their whole life and worry about where the money is coming from for the essentials of shelter, food and clothing then just drop out of high school or quit school after graduating from high school and plan to struggle the rest of the time.
I've been spending a lot of time lately with someone in this situation. She is 18, dropped out of high school and is struggling to finish her GED. There are a lot of other issues going on, but the basic idea that life is going to be a CONSTANT daily struggle for her from here on out has left an impression on me. She won't stand a chance of getting ahead in life working minimum wages jobs, using food stamps and trying to survive. I took her to the grocery store to get some food and learned how food stamps work. She was scared to death that she wouldn't have enough money on her food stamp debit card to pay for the items she had in her cart. Government and church financial assistance can only do so much. I'm going to try and influence her to get more training and education and increase her chances of better employment in the future. Why oh why don't people see that settling when they are young into this pattern of living is only going to cause a lot of hardship and grief over the course of their lives? Why don't they see that the choices they make today determine the lives they will lead tomorrow?
Why don't young people stay in school? Why don't they continue their education after high school and get some sort of training or skill? Why don't they see the direct correlation between learning and earning? Why don't they see that every effort to study and learn while they are young will come back to them 10 fold as they grown older? Why don't their parents work with them to get good grades and take their education seriously? Why do parents let their kids waste their time on so many mindless distractions while their futures crumble before their eyes?

I'm so grateful for my parents. They valued education. They saw to it that each of their seven children got an education and some training so that they could support themselves and so that they wouldn't have to work minimum wage jobs. They sacrificed so that we could have this great gift. They valued education for the basic advantage it gave us to be well rounded and to be able to reason, write, think, discuss and know what is going on in the world. They valued it because they wanted us to be happy and successful and to strive towards something worthwhile. They set the example of how to contribute to society in meaningful ways and they expected us to do the same.

What keeps people from getting a degree or certificate of some sort after high school graduation?

I thought this graphic was very interesting. This article in the D News makes some really interesting points about Utahns specifically:

• Utahns with a degree or certification have an income level 75% higher than those who do not and are 2 1/2 time more likely to hold a salaried position that come with benefits.
• over the course of their work life, students who receive a Bachelors degree earn about $650,000 more than high school graduates. They also experience increased career opportunities, better health care benefit and overall a deeper quality of life.
• A child with parents who did not earn a degree had a 27.8 percent chance of earning one. If one parent earned a degree, that number rose to 41.8 percent, and if both parents have degrees the number peaks at 55.2 percent. Students with both parents and at least one sibling with degrees had the highest chance at 80 percent.
• Nationwide, Americans with at least a four-year bachelor’s degree tend to be employed more. The Bureau of Labor Statistics reports that, in July 2011, the unemployment rate for those with at least a bachelor’s degree was only 4.3 percent, compared to 15 percent for those who have not finished high school, 9.3 percent for those who have only a high school diploma but no secondary education.
• Utah's universities and colleges need to be more flexible in helping people obtain a degree while juggling jobs and family. This seems to be the biggest obstacle.
  

My personal feeling is that young families need to be prepared to sacrifice to gain an education. There are grants and loans and ways to make it happen. I worked very hard to help my husband complete his graduate degree and we sacrificed in a lot of ways to get through those years. We were really, really poor and those were very hard years. But we made it and we slowly started to see the benefits of the sacrifice. I hope that young people will weigh the benefits and the disadvantages and make the choice to work hard while they are young to obtain a college education or some sort of specialized training.

Money doesn't buy happiness, but there is a clear connection between the level of education an individual achieves and the level of happiness he has in life.

Aging gracefully

You want to age gracefully, right? Who wants to look old and worn out? Who wants to move like they're old and worn out? Who wants to be old and worn out?
Here are some great tips from an article I read:
1. Avoid the big no-no's: Don't smoke, don't get sun damaged and drink only moderately ( or in my case, not at all.)

2. Get moderate exercise: exercise is "the strongest beneficial behavior intervention that we know about." Moderate exercise makes the biggest difference

For example a 20- to 30-minute aerobic workout on the bike or machine three to four days a week followed by 10 to 20 minutes of weight training.

3. Eat a healthy diet and eat moderately: eliminate many unhealthful foods from the diet and reduced portion sizes, eat more whole grains, much less fat, more fish and more fruit and vegetables, eat red meat very sparingly (something in red meat accelerates inflammation in arteries and it turns out that inflammation in arteries ages your skin, ages your heart, ages all the things where your blood vessels go.)

4. Eat a diet high in antioxidants: dark fruits and vegetables such as blueberries, blackberries, watermelon, dark romaine lettuce and other dark greens. These foods are good because they are full of antioxidants, which are thought to bind with the unstable molecules that are constantly released as a byproduct of metabolism.

Although the science is still not conclusive for humans, there is strong evidence that these free radicals, knocking around in search of other molecules to bind to, damage healthy cells in the process. This oxidative stress can lead to inflammation and other adverse effects.

5. Take Vitamin E: take moderate (200 milligrams a day) Vitamin E supplements daily. Vitamin E is a powerful antioxidant that, in animal testing, has been shown to prolong the life of cells and reduce cell proliferation. It can help maintain your youthful look. Vitamin E, working alone or in concert with other vitamins, is doing more than improving appearance Your insides will look way better than you outsides because of this vitamin. Researchers have found a "significant" reduction in the incidence of prostate cancer, cardiovascular disease and overall mortality after 12 to 20 years.

Also important are practices like moisturizing skin daily, flossing regularly, managing stress well, having a rewarding job, a hobby that's enjoyable, and also a good marriage and healthy kids. Many experts said living a happy life is a key element in aging well. The message is simple - Making an effort can really pay off.

Read more: http://www.heraldextra.com/lifestyles/article_4be82c97-c256-51fe-831e-6b67ea1c57d0.html#ixzz1VPCnALhY

Grandparents that make a difference

We had a wonderful family reunion on Saturday. 95 people from my Dad's side of the family got together for about four hours to visit and be together. It was a lovely time to remember our grandparents Ray and Mayme and the legacy they left us. They were strong links in the chain that binds the generations. They showed us how to live life and how to pursue the things in life that are truly important. It was great to see uncles, aunts, cousins and their children and to see the number of people who are the product of these two wonderful people.

Our grandparents also taught us about the basic four food groups: pie, ice cream, cake and cookies. We enjoyed eating all of these traditional desserts: molasses cookies with frosting, homemade carmel ice cream, "poor-man's apple pudding," creme raisin pie and chocolate cake. Yum!

One cousin said: "Saturday reminded me of how much I love associating with the extended family. It always brings a smile to my face. Remembering Ray and Mayme was delightful."

And another said: "I will long remember the wonderful words that were spoken regarding our amazing Ray and Mayme and our dear parents. We are truly blessed with a unique and special heritage and to be a part of it all is, well...just a gift."

An aunt said: "such a great family. I feel blesseed to be a part of it. Grandma Mayme and Grandpa Ray left us a wonderful heritage. You could just feel the love on Saturday."

(If anyone took some pictures of the reunion, please share with me. My camera got dropped and broken and so I couldn't take any pictures.)

Now that I'm a grandparent, I realize even more the important contribution that grandparents can make to the lives of their posterity. Research has shown that grandparents can prove to be a resource to their families in so many important ways. They can actually influence fundamental aspects of their grand-children's lives, including helping them form their own individual identities and in conveying to them family values, ideals and beliefs.
Grandparents can act as family historians, mentor-teachers and also be nurturers of emotional and physical well-being. They are role models as they model how to live honorable and respectable lives. They can be the heroes after which many children seek to pattern their lives. They can also be playmates and be involved in activities that strengthen inter-generational ties.
They can:

• Organize and attend family get-togethers (reunions, birthdays and holiday celebrations)


• Work together (chores, running errands, community service, paid employment)


• Actively spend time together (board games, puzzles, playing catch, hunting and fishing, shopping, taking walks and drives)


• Attend religious-oriented activities (attending church services and socials together)


• Participate in family-oriented activities (writing and sharing personal histories, visiting extended family, visiting cemeteries, and discussing one's childhood and ancestors_


• Converse regularly (face-to-face, phone calls, letters, emails, Skype and text messaging.)


• Offer advice and counsel when requested

For more great grandparent information see:
www.aarp.org/family/grandparenting
www.grandparents.com
www.helpguide.org/mental/grandparenting.htm

What makes families flourish, what makes them fail?

I came across two interesting articles lately and the content of those articles are polar opposites...what makes families flourish and what makes them fail? Obviously much has been written on the subject and there are many theories as to why some fail and some flourish. Check out this talk given by the Mayor of Philadelphia to members of that community. I've got to hand it to Mayor Michael Nutter. He hit the nail on the head in the 30 minutes that he addressed his church congregation about the problems in their city. You can even watch it here.

Nutter’s chastisements—which didn’t spare parents, either—included:

• “Take those God darn hoodies down, especially in the summer. Pull your pants up and buy a belt ’cause no one wants to see your underwear or the crack of your butt. Nobody. If you're going to act like a butt head, your butt is going to get locked up."
  
• “If you walk into somebody’s office with your hair uncombed and a pick in the back, and your shoes untied, and your pants half down, tattoos up and down your arms and on your neck, and you wonder why somebody won’t hire you? They don’t hire you ’cause you look like you’re crazy!”
• “The Immaculate Conception of our Lord Jesus Christ took place a long time ago, and it didn’t happen here in Philadelphia. So every one of these kids has two parents who were around and participating at the time. They need to be around now.”
• “Parents, get your act together. Get it together right now! Parents who neglect their children, who don’t know where they are, who don‘t know what they’re doing, who don‘t know who they’re hanging out with, you’re going to find yourself spending some quality time with your kids in jail.”
• To fathers: “You not a father just because you have a kid or two or three. If you're not providing moral instruction to your children and only sending child-support payments you are just a human ATM. If you doing neither, you're just a sperm donor.”

Nutter zeroed in on the true root causes of the trouble in their city - "irresponsible parents and their ignorant, slovenly and undisciplined kids." Wow. I admire his courage in lowering the boom.

What works then in strengthening families? Check out this article in the BYU Magazine on the latest research on the subject. There are five key components that families who flourish actually DO on a regular basis. They involve all members of the family in their pursuit of a family that flourishes. This way of living in a family is internalized living versus only doing lip service to these practices . The five key principles are:

Commitment
Forgiveness
Kindness
SacrificingLack of relational aggression