This idea has been percolating for a long time in my head. I've read some ideas and thoughts of other people on the topic and I've seen some things around me that frankly, for my taste, have been very disconcerting. There are a lot of opinions out there on the topic and for what it's worth, here is my two cents worth. The questions are these: Do a bunch of LDS women seem to want to look sexy and modest at the same time? If so, why do LDS women want to look sexy for other people? Why are some so influenced by the world that their goal is to look sexy and provocative and to strut their stuff and show off their bodies for others to see and admire? It bothers me. It really bothers me to see grown women dressing and strutting around trying to attract the attention and admiration of other men (I suppose that is the objective) or trying to show up other women. What are the reasons as you see it? I suppose at the very least they are just trying to show how "fit" they are, but seriously, WHO are they trying to impress and WHY?
Don't get me wrong, I think it is important to look nice and take care of our bodies and to watch our appearance. Proper weight and nutrition are very important. Taking good care of the bodies we were given is a basic gospel concept. Looking stylish is important to a degree, but not at the expense of actually dressing modestly. But having the goal to look sexy for the guy on the street, is a foreign and false concept to me.
Maybe I'm showing my age. I probably am. I don't think that for one nanno second that I have looked in the mirror before leaving the house and thought, wow, I look sexy. I don't want to look sexy. I don't want to attract attention. I don't want people to look at me and admire my physical appearance or my body. Not gonna happen. I want to be known for who I am and what I do, not what I look like. And it's not that I don't have a good self concept. Those of you who know me understand that that is not the case.
I do want to look nice. I want to look attractive and well put together. My ultimate goal is to look classy and to be modest. But to look sexy for other people - never. There is a time and place to look and feel sexy, and it isn't out on the street in my opinion.
Which brings me to the next point. I think that most LDS women realize that looking sexy shouldn't be the goal. So some go for a sexy/modest look. Seriously? I don't think it is possible to look sexy AND modest. In fact, there was a billboard in our county that was trying to sell t-shirts on this concept. Buy this t-shirt and look sexy, oh, and also modest. Buy this skin tight t-shirt that covers your stomach, but shows off every nook and cranny of your body and you're good to go. If it shows some cleavage, no problem, your stomach is covered and that is all that really matters.
I know, I know, don't get me started.
I guess that since I've ventured this far onto the hot seat I might as well unload the rest of it.
Billboards in Utah. There are scores and scores on the theme of looking sexy. You know the kind - I've seen "get your sexy on - come in and work on your abs" or "teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini" showing a huge photo of a bust for breast augmentation and plastic surgery, or "tighten up and lose the fat" of a practically naked body for liposuction, etc. etc. etc. It makes me sick and it seems to be doing a booming business in Utah for "self improvement." I still don't understand how a bigger bust line raises self esteem.
And finally - temple going women who push the envelope with the clothes they wear or who prance around in inappropriate clothes when they should and could be wearing appropriate clothes. They know the difference and they chose to disregard the instructions. I lose respect, what can I say? I'm not at all impressed. Actually, I'm very disappointed and I think they are being quite foolish. Is that being judgmental? Maybe it is, but maybe it is just taking a stand.
I guess this concept of sexy/modest is one sticking point with people who refer to "Utah Mormons" who are trying to live the standards with one foot (or more) in the world. Moms who look like and dress like and sometimes act like their teenage daughters. Who is the parent an who is the kid? Sometimes it's hard to tell. I'm an advocate of age appropriate dress, but that's just me. I worry about girls who have the concept that looking good is more important that being good. I'm concerned with the visual images of women and girls immodestly dressed that my husband and sons are subjected to every day. Elder Dallin Oaks referred to immodest dress of our LDS women and young women as visual pornography. Ouch! I suppose these concepts are part of the reason these recent conference addresses have been given. See Susan Tanner and Elaine Dalton for a start.
"Do we view the body as a thing to be consumed and exploited. Realizing and following the truth about the body brings freedom—freedom from the tyranny of vanity, fashion, envy, superficiality, self-criticism, backbiting, the ill effects of overeating or under eating, lust, pornography, substance addiction, tattooing, and a host of other forms of worldly weight and oppression." Diane Spangler - BYU Psychology professor
The question is, will WE pay attention, wake up and set the proper example for our own sons and daughters and the countless others who look to us for an example? Will we internalize the teachings and see the wisdom in the direction and council we have been given? Will we help our children see the strong and direct connection between modesty in dress and the preservation of virtue which leads to freedom and peace? It's up to us. No one else can or should take the responsibility. If not now, when? If not us, who?
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
Hie to Kolob
Rick and I attended a fascinating lecture at the BYU Planetarium last Thursday night with one of the clubs I attend. It was so interesting to learn more about our solar system and the huge vastness of space. I'll admit I don't know that much about the solar systems and star patterns, but I loved learning more about both. Here is a fascinating web site to learn more and see some great photos. Also check out the NASA web site. Very good stuff. I've always loved the hymn, "If You Could Hie to Kolob" and the visual images that it conjours up. Here are the words to the hymn:
If You Could Hie to Kolob, hymn number 284 - by William W. Phelps
1. If you could hie to Kolob In the twinkling of an eye,And then continue onward With that same speed to fly,Do you think that you could ever, Through all eternity,Find out the generation Where Gods began to be?
2. Or see the grand beginning, Where space did not extend?Or view the last creation, Where Gods and matter end?Me thinks the Spirit whispers, “No man has found ‘pure space,’Nor seen the outside curtains, Where nothing has a place.”
3. The works of God continue, And worlds and lives abound;Improvement and progression Have one eternal round.There is no end to matter; There is no end to space;There is no end to spirit; There is no end to race.
4. There is no end to virtue; There is no end to might;There is no end to wisdom; There is no end to light.There is no end to union; There is no end to youth;There is no end to priesthood; There is no end to truth.
5. There is no end to glory; There is no end to love;There is no end to being; There is no death above.There is no end to glory; There is no end to love;There is no end to being; There is no death above.
1. If you could hie to Kolob In the twinkling of an eye,And then continue onward With that same speed to fly,Do you think that you could ever, Through all eternity,Find out the generation Where Gods began to be?
2. Or see the grand beginning, Where space did not extend?Or view the last creation, Where Gods and matter end?Me thinks the Spirit whispers, “No man has found ‘pure space,’Nor seen the outside curtains, Where nothing has a place.”
3. The works of God continue, And worlds and lives abound;Improvement and progression Have one eternal round.There is no end to matter; There is no end to space;There is no end to spirit; There is no end to race.
4. There is no end to virtue; There is no end to might;There is no end to wisdom; There is no end to light.There is no end to union; There is no end to youth;There is no end to priesthood; There is no end to truth.
5. There is no end to glory; There is no end to love;There is no end to being; There is no death above.There is no end to glory; There is no end to love;There is no end to being; There is no death above.
I think the music matches the lyrics well. In particular, I like the way the line “The works of God continue” resonates.
The theme is interesting. We don’t talk much about Kolob but the MTC missionaries LOVE to sing this hymn and they sing it with gusto. This hymn is of course only peripherally about Kolob. What it is really about is the endlessness of creation, and that is an endlessly fascinating theme.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Provo temple walk
I love to see the temple.
I'm going there someday
To feel the Holy Spirit,
To listen and to pray.
For the temple is a house of God,
A place of love and beauty.
I'll prepare myself while I am young;
This is my sacred duty.
I love to see the temple.
I'll go inside someday.
I'll cov'nant with my Father;
I'll promise to obey.
For the temple is a holy place
Where we are sealed together.
As a child of God,
I've learned this truth;
A fam'ly is forever
Lauren and I had a great Grandma adventure today while Ellie and Jordan were napping. We went to the MTC to meet Rick and the missionaries from our branch for lunch. Lauren walked pasted the "Easter picture" and wanted to have her picture taken by Jesus.
Afterwords, we walked around the MTC grounds and looked at all the pretty flowers. We smelled most of them and identified each color. Next we went to the Provo temple grounds and walked around to the "backyard" as Lauren called it and we even went in to a couple of "jungles" and gathered a few pine cones from underneath the huge pine trees there. We talked about getting married some day in the temple. Lauren learned that this was the temple where Aunt Claire and Uncle R got married.
Saturday we payed a visit to Rick's parents home. Pat made us a delicious meal and we had a nice time visiting. The girls loved playing on the trampoline and running around the yard and swinging on the swings.
Here is a picture from our front steps 48 hours after the huge snow storm featured last Thursday. Rick was moving the lawn less than 48 hours later. Utah weather. Ya.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Conference word cloud
I always think these word collages are so interesting. They take the words that are most frequently used and enlarge them to show which words are spoken the most often. It kind of gives us an "at-a-glance" summary of the important messages and themes of the LDS General Conference.
I thought this blog was very interesting. The following thought comes from it:
When Elder Neil L. Andersen rose to the pulpit last Sunday morning for the first time as a newly sustained member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, these were his first words:
My dear brothers and sisters across the world, my knees are weak and my emotions close to the surface. I express my love for you and profoundly thank you for your sustaining vote. In so many dimensions, I feel inadequate and humbled. I take solace that in one qualification for the holy apostleship where there can be no latitude extended, the Lord has deeply blessed me. I do know with perfect and certain clarity through the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ, the Beloved Son of God … To those who know me, if ever I have been less than I should have been in your presence, I ask for your forgiveness and patience. I so very much need your faith and prayers in my behalf. I know that I am not what I must become. I pray that I might be willing and moldable to the Lord’s tutoring and correction.
In short, Elder Andersen briefly acknowledged how nervous he was, and then immediately fulfilled the key responsibility of being a Special Witness–he bore a plain, but powerful, testimony of the reality of Jesus Christ as the Son of God. He concluded his introduction with a genuine prayer for forgiveness and patience from those he may have wronged.I was so impressed by this opening statement that I was inspired (or maybe just driven by curiosity) to go and seek out the first words of every other living Prophet, Seer, and Revelator on the Earth today. A couple of observations, as well as the quotes from each address (with some minor editing on my part) are presented below. Note that many of these men spoke in General Conference prior to being called as an Apostle.
My dear brothers and sisters across the world, my knees are weak and my emotions close to the surface. I express my love for you and profoundly thank you for your sustaining vote. In so many dimensions, I feel inadequate and humbled. I take solace that in one qualification for the holy apostleship where there can be no latitude extended, the Lord has deeply blessed me. I do know with perfect and certain clarity through the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ, the Beloved Son of God … To those who know me, if ever I have been less than I should have been in your presence, I ask for your forgiveness and patience. I so very much need your faith and prayers in my behalf. I know that I am not what I must become. I pray that I might be willing and moldable to the Lord’s tutoring and correction.
In short, Elder Andersen briefly acknowledged how nervous he was, and then immediately fulfilled the key responsibility of being a Special Witness–he bore a plain, but powerful, testimony of the reality of Jesus Christ as the Son of God. He concluded his introduction with a genuine prayer for forgiveness and patience from those he may have wronged.I was so impressed by this opening statement that I was inspired (or maybe just driven by curiosity) to go and seek out the first words of every other living Prophet, Seer, and Revelator on the Earth today. A couple of observations, as well as the quotes from each address (with some minor editing on my part) are presented below. Note that many of these men spoke in General Conference prior to being called as an Apostle.
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