Another surgery for Jake

Our wonderful son-in-law Jake had another brain surgery on April 29.  Rick and I went down to AZ to help the following day.  It is so hard to see him suffer through multiple surgeries and treatments and so see our daughter suffer right along with him.  It's impossible to make sense of it all. Glioblastoma brain cancer is a very cruel disease.
When we got there, we just jumped in and tried to help with the children and whatever else we could do to lend a hand.  Jordan asked us to deep clean her kitchen so we got to work and scrubbed down walls, cleaned out everything and put it back together again.  Our daughter Claire was able to come over with Lizzie and Will and she was a marvelous help.  Jake's parents also came down and we spend some time comforting each other and trying to comfort our children and help them.  Did I say this is hard?  The hundreds (thousands?) of prayers that were offered for this little family were felt and they gave comfort. We are so grateful to good people everywhere who are supporting Jake and Jordan and their family in any way they can.  Beautiful flowers arrived from my sister Mary Ann and her husband Trace.  So many people have reached out that I can't even begin to mention.
Jake is a wonder.  He bounces back from brain surgery very well and within three days we was sitting on the side lines of his daughters soccer and volleyball games.  He has such a strong will to live and to live as normally as possible.  He strengthens those around him when we should be strengthening him.  He is goodness from head to toe and all parts in-between.  To say he is a wonderful husband and father would be an understatement.  We marvel at his strength, courage and determination to do all in his power to keep going.  What an example he and Jordan are to us all, even when they don't want to be in that position.
I stayed almost six days and we had some good times as well.  Retail therapy always helps and a visit to a Scottsdale mall and to Last Chance is just what the doctor ordered.  The six cousins enjoyed themselves playing in the pool, jumping on the tramp and going on some bike rides.
The comfort of family and feeling of their strength and support is like a calming balm to me.  Prayers and blessings were offered and it just helped everyone being together.  I love my dear daughter Jordan and her Jacob.  They are celebrating their 11th wedding anniversary this weekend.  Their love for one another is exemplary.  They are truly two parts of a whole and when one part is going through something, the other part feels it too.  We all pray that the comfort and peace of the atonement will rest over them and give them the strength they need to continue to put their trust in God.

Will helping to deep clean the table and chairs

Soccer champ Ellie playing the game she loves

Tommy give Ellie a love and Jake attending his daughter's soccer
 game just three days after brain surgery.  He amazes us all.

Ellie and her coach

Cousins who are just 22 hours apart in age.
They love each other.

and love to get silly.

Swim time watching all six children. Lauren and Ellie are amazing swimmers.

Love my Jake and Jordan.  Truly.

Will on his scooter bike.  He is amazing on that thing.

Off they go.  Will, Ada and Lizzie with Tommy supervising.

Cutest one year old around.  Love this little man.

Miss Lauren showing us how it is done in volleyball.

I've been doing in WRONG my entire life

Who knew??  Seam ripper 101.  I've been schooled.

March goal report

1.  Attend all 15 temples in Utah, attend the temple twice a month        January - Salt Lake City with Stephanie as she received her endowment & Phoenix temple, February - Monticello temple & Provo temple, March - Jordan River temple & Bountiful temple

2.  read the Ensign every month
      January - check
      February - check
      March - check
3.  dejunk, clean and organize my home
4.  update all my photo albums, label and date them
While in St. George for a week, I started this process by organizing all the loose photos and starting putting them back in the albums where they belong
5.  start writing my personal history
6.  sew something for each grandchild
     made Lizzie an apron
     made Will a Superman cape
7.  sew my Christmas presents
8.  spend more time in my yard gardening, etc.
9.  walk 10,000 steps 5 days a week (thanks to my new FitBit this will be measurable!)
    January -  I'm averaging about 6,000 steps over five days a week, thanks to my FitBit for keeping track.   February - I need to kick that up once I can get outside more.  Not doing as well as I would like to.  March - my FitBit stopped working, but I'm doing my routine and hopefully hitting my goal. 
10.  Lose 15 pounds
     Lost the two I put on plus one more.  Moving in the right direction now. Slowly. March - slow progress, 1 pound lost
11.  Read 15 books
       Orphan Train
       Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet
       Mary, the Mother of Jesus
12.  support and love my mother more in her advancing years
       January - visited Mom at her home and took her to the Hardware Ranch, a place she use to visit as a child,  February - called her several time a week, March - visited for the weekend, helped her set up her patio, went on some drives, helped her with her meds, etc.
13.  strengthen the relationships with people I care about
January - went to breakfast with Kathleen, attended a concert with Shelley, Kevin, Marie and Cydnee, went to dinner at the Dixon's home, babysat for Adam and Syd so they could have a break, invited Cydnee over for a sleepover, visited Jordan and Jake and family, attended Kate's welcome home, went to the airport to welcome her, went to lunch with LaRita, February - attended a benefit dinner with the Lindleys, visited Claire and R and family, visited Sarah F., had the Densley's over for dinner, attended a bridal shower for Brooke, threw a birthday luncheon for Kathleen, attended and helped at Brooke's wedding reception, March - went to Sofia's thesis defense, enjoyed my mom, sisters and nieces at my 60th birthday party, met Mary R. for lunch, helped Dara with her finances and went to help her find a new place to live, had the Juan P.s over for dinner, went to lunch with Tiffany and Diane, went to dinner with Scott H. and Lori, spent time together getting a pedicure with my aunt Lorna and cousin Diane
14.  serve at UVU in the Women's Success Center board
Met for two board meetings and contributed.  Signed up to mentor three college students, got training and met with them individually (one widowed mother of five, one 18 year old, one 20 year old from a troubled family) to help them work towards receiving a college degree, attended more meetings and met with my mentees and provided breakfast, attended a talk by Sheri Dew sponsored by the Women's Success center, met with my mentees during the month
15.  finish visiting the rest of the 50 states I haven't been to including: Kansas, Nebraska, Iowa, Missouri and Oklahoma

15 days and counting

I'm going to retire from working at BYU on April 30.  15 more work days and then....DONE!
This is the end of an era, a very long one.  I started working full-time here in August of 1979. Even though I was trained to teach Home Economics, there were no jobs to be found in that area at the time.  I was thrilled to find a full-time job at BYU since I had just graduated and Rick was starting law school.    I've worked in several different offices, all within the college of Family, Home and Social Sciences.  I've worked stints of full-time, part-time, three-quarter time and I've been on call during almost all of those years (with a two year break teaching Home Economics at Independence High School.)
One of the greatest perks of working at BYU has been the opportunity I've had to see our four kids on campus as they have completed their education here as students.  I also got to spend some time with R, Courtney and Chelsea since there were students here also (Jake had already graduated and was on to law school when he started dating Jord.)
I have such great memories of meeting them for lunch, going to the Bookstore with them, buying textbooks with my faculty/staff discount, bringing them treats and items from home, helping them get around and find where to go, loaning them my car, meeting their friends, hosting their friends with food during devotionals, helping them have access to printers, staplers and such,  employing some of their friends,  listening to them talk about their lives, their dates, their classes and their hopes and dreams.  They have eaten their lunches in my office, as well as bummed some lunches off of me.  It has truly been a pleasure to see them walk in to my office during the day and just sit down and chat.  There have only been a few years since Jordan started school here in 1999, that one of them hasn't been on campus with me.  At one point, Jordan, Claire and Dave were all students here. It has been a wonderful blessing to be able to work in the same location as my children who were going to school.  I will cherish the memories!

As a final lunch a couple of weeks ago, I met Andy and Chelsea for the LAST TIME at the Pen Court for lunch in the ESC.  The Pen Court was closing down for the semester and it was our last hurrah.  They are graduating in April and I am retiring.  No more lunches at the Pen Court.  It's a mixed bag of emotions as we all close this chapter of our lives.

You were born to lead

Chelsea and I had the wonderful opportunity a few weeks ago to attend a special speaking engagement at Utah Valley University with keynote speaker, Deseret Book CEO Sheri Dew.  We were invited to attend a pre-speech meet-and-greet with other members of the UVU Women's Success center board and other guests.  It was so fun to attend with Chelsea and introduce her to some of the wonderful women I have met in our community.  One of my great heroes was there...Ardeth Kapp.  She was the general Young Women's president when I served as our stake Young Women president.  Years ago we invited her to come and speak to our young women and others from several stakes in our area and she came and gave them such great counsel.  It was fun to see her again.

The Keynote speaker was Sheri Dew with an introduction and speech by former YW general president Elaine Dalton.  Both of these women are such an inspiration to me.  They lead with conviction and love and they are wonderful speakers.  I took copious notes and want to share some of what they said. I was inspired, motivated, encouraged, and rewarded for attending and I'm so happy I go be there with Chelsea.

Elaine Dalton said:  Ordinary Mary, mother of Jesus.  Extraordinary task accomplished.  Using our ordinary talents and abilities can change the world.  Leadership is hard.  It can be exhilarating, rewarding...but it is never easy.  It's about influence.  Learn techniques to influence.  The leader doesn't have to have all the answers.  They just need to know how to find the answers.  Be a person people will follow.  Leaders are needed everywhere.  The leadership of women is critical.  Women can see things.  We know what the needs are.  We can be a combination of courage and compassion.  We will have direct influence on 1,000s of people over our lifetimes.

Sheri Dew gave an inspiring address. Speaking to women of all ages, she said, "The best leaders are perpetual learners. An inspired leader is always learning -- from mistakes, from others, and from experience. I'm not sure it is possible for a poor learner to be a good leader."

She shared seven principles of influence:
1.  Your leadership is not about YOU.  Lift others, don't elevate yourself.  Help others do and become more than they could become on their own.  Model for others how to do something.  Selfless leaders tend to be optomistic and positive.
2.  Leadership is utterly dependent on trust.  Without trust it is only a strategy.  Relationships of trust bear fruit.  How can we trust someone...that their motives are pure, their judgement is good, we will feel the truth.  Do people you lead trust you?
3.  Experience is the best teacher.  New experiences lead to results.  First - Experiences, second -beliefs, third - action, forth- results.   What new experiences can you give to people you lead?
4.  The best leaders are perpetual learners.  Learn from mistakes, hire the brains, ask good questions, the best you can do is the best you can do. Leadership exposes your weaknesses.  You can't hide, ignore or deny.  You must acknowledge and compensate for inadequacies.   Leaders accept responsibility.  It is always important to know what you do not know.
5.  The best leaders are both courageous and kind.  Always show more kindness than seems necessary.  Everyone has value and wants that value to be recognized. Leadership is sometime lonely.  Show courage, compassion and consideration.
6.  It's easier to motivate someone to do something difficult than to motivate them to do something easy.  Our leaders should call upon us to do more.  A life that doesn't stretch us doesn't help us to grow.
7.  Inspired leadership endures.  It is devoted to something greater than themselves.  Every woman giver her life to what she believes in.  Each day, endeavor to be more than you were. 

 For more information on the event, see the write up on the local newspaper HERE